Changing to Stay the Same

Written by Fr Anthony Musaala

Father Anthony Aliddeki Musaala, Luteete.Tremendous thanks to all who take time to respond to my posts. Facebook interactions though sometimes tough, can help to get information out directly and quickly.

It can also help to uncover what need not be hidden. Many of you have been deeply shocked and concerned about me because you feel that I have taken a surprising new direction out of the Roman Church for perhaps unclear reasons.

Clarifications

I would now like to clarify some of these very personal reasons, why my present status with regard to the Roman Catholic church has changed, for those sympathetically inclined to listen. For those who are not, you might want to spend your time doing something else, since this will not be an easy read. It must be read in its entirety.\

Let us begin with this simple question. Is Fr Anthony Musaala a Catholic priest or not? The answer to this seemingly simple question is not a straightforward “Yes or no”.

This is not because the notion of a ‘Catholic priest’ lacks definition but because as applied to my biography it may seem to do so .

Let’s be clear. A ‘Catholic priest’ with a big letter ‘C’ means a priest who belongs to the Roman Catholic church. A ‘catholic priest’ with a small letter ‘c’ however, may mean any priest who belongs to any church which is part of the One Holy Catholic Apostolic Church, of which the Roman or Latin rite Catholic Church is only one part, not the whole.

Two answers Yes and No

So the first answer to the question of whether I am a catholic priest is Yes,

I was ordained a priest 22 years ago, by Cardinal Wamala at Lubaga, and have not yet been dismissed or laicized by the Pope no less, according to canon 292 # 2 of church law; nor have I voluntarily requested dismissal from the clerical state, for a grave reason, which I am able to do according to canon 292#3 of ecclesiastical law and which I may or may not do because of my new state.

Therefore as far as I know I am legally still both a Catholic priest with a big ‘C’ as well as a catholic priest with a small ‘c’, until I am dismissed from the clerical state or laicized.

Another answer as to the question as to whether I am a Catholic priest is a resounding No. I don’t feel like a Catholic priest anymore because I have not functioned as one for three years, due to suspension.

Though legally a Catholic priest, I am no longer one in any meaningful sense of the word, except in the sense of having once been ordained. ‘Being’ a priest is wonderful, but being a priest and not doing a priest’s work is miserable.

I am reminded of the Lord Mayor of Kampala, Mr Elias Lukwago who is by right the Lord Mayor of Kampala city, but who in fact cannot function as Mayor because he was shut out of his offices. Although hugely popular this does not assist his functioning as a Mayor. Mr Museveni even pointed this out by making rather gloating remarks about Mr Lukwago as only having the Mayoral chains and titles but no power!

So now because of a similiar situation of no priestly office or function for three years for me, and no hope of being restored to it, I have freely and deliberately decided to function as a catholic priest elsewhere, within another church which holds the catholic faith, namely the Evangelical Orthodox Church.

This small Church is not under Roman or Latin jurisdiction, nor any Eastern jurisdiction, such as Antioch or Constantinople or Moscow but is autocephalous and autonomous, having its head or Presiding Bishop in Canada.

I will function with them as a catholic priest since they are catholics too with a small ‘c’. For all intents and purposes, I will no longer minister to Roman Catholics, unless by invitation, since one cannot serve two masters.

Bible and theological matters

Next, I would like to share with you some biblical and theological insights into the priestly state and its permanent nature. Now both the royal (1 Peter2:9) and hierarchical priesthood which I received in the Roman Catholic church when I was baptised and ordained, are strictly speaking derived from Christ’s High priesthood.

It is He of whom it was written:

“You are priest for ever in the Order of Melchizadek of old” (Ps 110:4, Hebrews 7:17).

This phrase by the way, now applies to all priests in the church, not just to those ordained.In any case it is the basis for the permanent nature of the priesthood. Theologically speaking, we may say that the ‘ontological change’ (change of fundamental being) wrought by baptism and by valid ordination, is what still makes me a catholic priest ‘forever’.

Nevertheless, the actual context of my Catholic priesthood bow may render this word “forever”, quite meaningless. Priesthood is always contextual. The priesthood of repeated sacrifices in the Old covenant for instance is meaningless in the New Covenant because its context had changed. The priesthoods of the Old and New Covenants emerged from very real but different historical/social contexts, which also determined their function and meaning.

Thus Melchisedek and Christ were both eternal priests, but different kinds of priests. It’s only Christ’s perfect High priesthood of the Messianic era, and not Melchisedek’s of the pre-messianic era, which is effective for salvation, and so more truly ‘a priesthood forever’ after all. Enough..

Now my being ‘a priest forever’, is not for me divorced from my present context and reality of my being suspended Firstly, the priesthood I have is in itself is derivative; derived from that of Christ and His Church. Secondly, because I am only a human being, not divine like Christ, I am mortal not immortal; so even this priesthood I now have will only endure as long as I am alive. At my death therefore (even though in Uganda we are buried in priestly robes), my priesthood ceases , since in heaven or the other places, neither priesthood nor marriage nor any sacrament are necessary.

So the question of the present context of my priesthood is very important for me in this discussion. It seemed to me that I was in a kind of critical vacuum with no context for priesthood in the Roman Church, or at least a no viable context . That to my mind was actually to have no priesthood at all! I would have rather been dismissed altogether from priesthood than be in such a suspended ‘vegetative’ state.

How I wished the Archbishop of Kampala would have dismissed me completely from priesthood if reinstatement was not possible. But he couldn’t. I discovered that things were not so simple. The Archbishop was under pressure to keep me in the dark for as long as possible, but without saying why.

Dishonesty was at work. Twice I wrote letters of apology to him with promises by him to release me. Twice I was told that my case was too ‘complicated’, mainly because I had appealed against the Archbishop’s suspension of me to the ecclesiastical court in Rome.

Another time quite recently Archbishop Lwanga wrote me a very promising letter saying that he would speedily release me to another Catholic Diocese, only to tell me weeks later that he wouldn’t do it. Why, because my case was ‘complicated’.

Later on insiders informed me that the Archbishop had just written the letter to please and pacify me. Why? In case I disrupted the Papal visit! Here was paranoia at work.

Anyway It seemed to be the classic form of Roman Catholic traumatizing psychology. ‘Thou shalt never know what we going to do to with you…..’’ Intolerable.

Although I had continued to recognize that the priesthood was a sacred gift and a sacrament, it was also the existential mode of my own life. It was actually the whole of my life, not just a part of it. My priesthood was contoured by who I was in the here and now, by where I was now, by my age , my character, my health, my abilities, my finances and talents now, not yesterday or tomorrow. I could not just therefore continue to be a priest who did nothing, while the Archbishop dithered..

Priesthood was also my voluntary service to the people of God which had to be rendered within a specific human ambit. A priesthood without an active ministry to the people, without a flock is a dead priesthood, a contradiction; unless of course a priest has become a contemplative monk.

How therefore could I possibly endure being such a priest, and a non-priest at the same time, for three years and counting? No way, Hose, as they say in America.

Unforgiveable
There are moral, psychological and canonical considerations for being a priest which cannot be eluded, but it is also true that every single priest has shortcomings, including me. A priest who is deemed to have offended, as I was so deemed on several counts, should be assisted to seek reconciliation and not just be slyly manipulated or shunted about by ecclesiastical authority.

Very sadly, despite several attempts to humble myself and be reconciled with the church because of any of my known faults , I found only scant and sometimes pretended mercy, and even less justice at Lubaga.

Occasionally the Archbishop would seem parental or fraternal in attitude, but then the ‘episcopal dominant’ would get the better of him and all would be totally lost. His Vicars were rapacious to say the least. They met me variously with condemnation, scorn, threats or pious, hollow words offered as advice, and of course unfulfilled promises.

This led me to think , rightly or wrongly, that in the Roman Church a priest may become of no value, once condemned. His time and usefulness are no more. This was only exacerbated by the refusal by the Archbishop to offer me even minimal financial or other support during my suspension, and this from a church which I had served tirelessly for twenty years.!

Here was callousness at work, I thought! How uncharitable! Surely this was contrary to law, whether divine, ecclesiastical or civil. But whom would I go to? Even the Apostolic Nuncio was warned not to see me and refused seven requests to see me over three years, until just the other day when I put my foot down. Why should I therefore not go elsewhere?

Finally it was a fact that I had served fruitfully in many places for 20 years and that this ‘fruit’ of priestly work was seen. It could not be denied or erased from people’s minds and hearts. There was a sense in which I would always be a priest in the hearts and minds of many people, whether I wanted to or not.

Why then was I was continually to be forbidden to serve? I knew I was not indispensible but also knew my own value to the church. Since I could not simply force myself where I was not wanted , I felt that it would be better for me to go elsewhere and serve, however humbly, until such a time as I was perhaps considered ‘useful’ again.

Summary

So in sum, my unsolved tryst with the Roman Catholic church was the first cause of my migration to Orthodoxy. I remain a ‘catholic priest’ however but not a ‘Catholic’ one, since as I said I have not effectively been one for three years anyway and cannot serve two masters now.

The anguish, stress, disappointment and scandal of suspension could not go on forever. Now it is gone.

The irony of all this is that I was actually suspended for the wrong reason namely, “publishing in the media scandalous material which offended the faith without consent of the bishop” or some such, which in fact I did not do.
The ‘offensive’ essay which I had written about failing celibacy among catholic priests, sexual abuse of female minors and abandoned priests’ children, had been sent directly to the Archbishop at Lubaga, on 16th March 2013 by me but was leaked by someone else not me, and without my knowledge or consent onto the internet on 18th March 2013,

The person later confessed this at Lubaga saying why and how he did it. Archbishop Lwanga suspended me on the 19th of March 2013, one day after the essay appeared in the media. The day of suspension happens to be the day of my ordination.

Despite all these facts being known by the Archbishop he would not lift the suspension, apparently due to some other ‘secret’ allegations on my secret file! These ‘secret’ alleged offences however all proved bogus and turned out to be a kind of defamation and blackmail, and since they lacked judicial standing, I refused to have them even mentioned to me since repeating them was also tantamount to defamation.

Incidentally other suspended Catholic priests whom I know, who have since been restored to ministry, or shielded from penalties for far graver matters than my own make me think why not me? Is there here a principle of natural or unnatural selection going on here? Perhaps we will never know. It will be regrettable maybe that I was not humble enough to endure all this any longer, Or perhaps it will not be regrettable. That is yet to be seen.

So I have now I have happily got all that off my chest, and entered a relatively obscure branch of Orthodoxy, the Evangelical Orthodox Church. I must say that it is not just because the Roman Church rejected me, but also because I discovered in this new church very credible spiritual values both in its leaders with whom I have interacted, and also in its living theology, liturgy, spirituality – all of which I have had some time to engage with, in study and in prayer, and by which I am very greatly enriched and renewed.

Now let’s pray for each other, perhaps for forgiveness, and move on….Pax Christi.
Father Anthony Aliddeki Musaala, Luteete.

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